Acknowledgments/Thank Yous

 

I hope the book made you laugh.

I’d like to thank you for buying it. I’m from the Midwest which means one out of every four sentences ends in either a thank you or an apology so, if you liked the book: thank you.

And if you hated it: I’m sorry.
 

I’d like to thank the following people who helped me make both the book and the stories in it:
 

My wife, Jessica, who always supports me, is the love of my life and a great mom to our three kids.
 

My family—my five brothers and sisters and my folks—who cracked me up my whole life and have, in later life, become an important comedy network where they text me the latest, craziest thing my dad said (the last one was: “I DROVE BY YOUR CHILDHOOD HOME AND SAW GUTTER DAMAGE. TRIED TO INTRODUCE MYSELF AND TALK ABOUT IT. DID NOT GO WELL.”).
 

Pat Brice and CJ Sullivan and all the guys behind “The Visitor’s Locker Room.” The best comics I met who taught me that great comedy starts not with the premise or the punchline but the right beer.
 

Tyson Lowery and all the Walsh guys: Jeff (x 4?), Tim, Willy, Ted, Brad, Sturz, Eric, and more. Half of these stories were created with you and, despite the bruises and hangovers we still do it again each year.
 

Adam “The Cane” Burke who edited this book. If you were to put The Cane on the border of Illinois and Indiana—not too far from where we live—and you were to say to The Cane, “You are to swat every bug that enters Illinois! We do not want them!” The Cane would respond, “I can do that, because I corrected every spelling mistake in Sean Flannery’s book, which is like swatting every bug on Earth!” The Cane is the best: funny, brainy, and sunny; the book wouldn’t have finished without his edits, insights, encouragement, and optimism.
 

All the Chicago comedy venues that provided me with opportunities but, in particular, The Comedy Bar and The Lincoln Lodge, both of which had a lot of faith in me and gave me a lot of leeway. And, in particular, The Comedy Bar, which had so much faith in me they allowed me to sign a life-time, “Never pay for a drink” contract. Hopefully this book enhances my profile because, if we are being honest, Comedy Bar is losing their shirt on that deal.
 

Steve and the whole team at JWT (Aaron, Dan, Dion, Erich, John and more). My comedy career, given some of the health challenges my family had, is mostly possible due to the great support I had at my day job. Also, those nerds somehow drink more than stand-ups.
 

The bars that elected NOT to throw me out, which I guess, when I think about it, is only two: Galway Bay and Pipeworks Brewery. Nolan and Jay of Galway bought me about a thousand Guinnesses and I know they always bought it because I made them laugh and they knew I had no money; but I appreciate that they lied, “It’s an investment; you’ll be a rich comedian some day and can promote us.” And Bobby Minnelli of Pipeworks, who, besides introducing me to some of the world’s greatest beers, had funnier stories than mine and encouraged me to start writing everything down.
 

Colin Lenehan for his tireless work editing the audio book (that guy erased out a lot of ice cube clanks), along with his past tech help at my live shows. Rudy Schultz for all the great artwork on this project and past ones. And Chris Ocken for the photographs.
 

I’m also debating about thanking COVID. It’s not that I feel grateful to it; COVID upended my life. Society ended. I gained twenty pounds. Because I couldn’t perform stand-up comedy — where drinks are comped, I had to pay for my drinks which meant, not only do I have no money, since I can’t perform but now I’m paying retail for gin (!) which was bad. But, I did write this book under lockdown and maybe that’s the closest thing to a ‘win’ COVID can put on the board; that it slightly improved teleconferencing software and some Irish jackass finished his memoirs on basement bar experiences.
 

Finally, I’d like to end on a thank you to a big group of people who were usually side-by-side with me in most these stories and did their best to help me recall the details. If people were to ask, “How true are all these stories?” I feel I can confidently answer, “No book has ever been truer, given this level of whiskey.” Thanks for the stories:

The Guys From Blerds and all the Chicago comics from way back then: Mikey O, Joey V, Ricky, The Puterbaughs, Ken, Brady, Josh, Kro, Joyce, Jonah, Kumail, Matt, Klinger, Emily, Nick, Meg, Matty, Aaron; The Cleveland Crew in Chicago: Monica, Meg, Jay, Paul, Frank, Gina, Angie, Doug, Joe; The Cap E&Y guys: Rich, Dave, Joe; The Comp USA people: Steve, Carl, Tom (x2), Joe, Josh; The Cleveland Crew: all my cousins and aunts and uncles, Homey, Kross, Bertsch, Steve L.